Darwin theories. oh humbug.

"hmmm... yucks." The cell thought to itself. The sea water was getting on its cell membrane. Plus, there wasn't anyone to talk to. Except... perhaps... itself. It was fed up. It was fed up being a lonely little cell with no one. No ONE. But sucky sea water to talk to.

The cell sat there and pondered really hard about this. So hard in fact, it felt it's nucleus split.
To its immense horror, it found a cell looking exactly like itself sitting just micrometres away. That was interesting. It tried again with more gusto.

And the cell became a plant.


The plant burped. Too much carbon dioxide in the system. "better out than in, my mom used to say..." it thought to itself. Then it realised it couldn't exactly remember who its mother was, or what she had looked like. All it faguely remembered was, it was born weirrrrrd. All its friends had nicely shaped leaves or the latest edition of Flowers! ver2.0 and all it HAD was... Tenticles. Yucky Icky Idiotic Tenticles.

Feeling rather sorry for itself, it burst out into tears sending all its spores out into the deep dark water. Little had it known, it would create a vast population of an entirely new spieces of seaweed.


A stinkbug was happy. Happier than a dungbeetle in poop. Which was mightily reasonable considering he had just found a way of making the world's most potent fart by mixing the two chemicals in its abdomen. Which was rather swell... at least until a badger appeared. It panicked, tried its best to release the world class mixture at once and promptly exploded on the spot.


Yucks, my half a cent on Darwin's theories. yuck. haha.. back to studying!!